Tai-where

Behold the Modern Toilet

2009-05-23T11:56:00.002+08:00

If being reminded of what your food looks like when it comes out while it's going in is your thing, then man-o-man is this the restaurant for you.

The Modern Toilet

Promises

2009-05-21T03:49:00.004+08:00

It's been about 2 months, but all I have are promises.

1. Pictures from the Modern Toilet. For those of you on Facebook, you probably have already seen them. But for those of you who are anti putting your business on the interwebs, I will post the link to the pics.

2. A Taiwan wrap up. I seriously sweat over this one. I still feel too connected to the experience, and too disconnected from my life in the US again to properly put it into a blog.

3. A new bloggity, blog, blog link about my not so Asian life.

Until then, much love and such.

I'll miss you Grandpa

2009-03-29T23:50:00.003+08:00

The dead are always looking down on us, they say.
while we are putting on our shoes or making a sandwich,
they are looking down through the glass bottom boats of heaven
as they row themselves slowly through eternity.

They watch the tops of our heads moving below on earth,
and when we lie down in a field or on a couch,
drugged perhaps by the hum of a long afternoon,
they think we are looking back at them,
which makes them lift their oars and fall silent
and wait, like parents, for us to close our eyes

Billy Collins.

Full of It

2009-03-26T19:14:00.004+08:00

I'm so going here before I leave.

Oh, yes. The Modern Toile t. The ice cream names are my favorite. "diarrhea with dried droppings" (chocolate), "bloody poop" (strawberry) and "green dysentery" (kiwi) Mmmm, mmmm.

Who's hungry?

Craptastic

2009-03-18T22:21:00.006+08:00

Someone did a google search for "Japanese bite penis" and got sent to my blog. hahaha

I'm in a bit of a funk because the school I work for, Kojen, is fucking with me. They took about a third of my pay check for breaking my contract, but failed to tell me that they were going to do this. They have a very liberal (not based on any sort of system) interpretation of the money I actually "owe" them. Another friend of mine who works for Kojen had her whole check withheld and then Kojen asked her to pay an extra $100 NT. She had to pay because Kojen was failing to give her enough hours. The whole thing is a bit ridiculous.

Kojen is notorious for messing with teachers who leave before their one year contract is up. They like to cancel work visas early or mark your visa as missionary (try traveling with a missionary stamp, ha!) and forget to pay your salary. I don't like it. And I don't like it mostly because it will take time to get them to unfuck with me, and let's face it, there's a million other things I rather do. Damn the Asian man.

Economic Crisis

2009-03-12T19:43:00.002+08:00

For everyone, who is not my brother, and is feeling a little lost about what is happening in with our economy and the options available to us to fix it, This American Life, has been doing a series of really informative (and simple! and clear!) shows on the economic crisis.

There are 3 shows so far, the latest of which, "Bad Banks", was actually the one I listened to first. After listening, I think I am actually prepared to have an intelligent, although limited, conversation on the subject. Not that I am demonstrating this at all in this blog. But go listen, be informed, so you don't sound like an asshole when talking about the economy like your local representative.

Birds on the Brain

2009-03-12T19:15:00.003+08:00

Before you begin, important Cultural Slang: Penis = bird , yellow = perverted (in Mandarin in Taiwan)

Speaking of the cultural implications of bird...

The book that we use for the upper levels at Kojen is American Shine. American Shine is an ok book. It is a book made by Brits teaching American English, so you'll often find random bits of British English, but that is forgivable and most likely useful to the students in the long term. The book is divided into 9 units with 4 lessons in each unit. After each unit, there is a running story, and some activities for the students to do. This all looks well and good, until you find out that the running story is called, "LA Bird"

The name is forgivable enough, but the story happens to be about a woman getting robbed. What did she lose you ask?

Her bird.

But her bird isn't an average bird, it is a big, expensive, special, yellow, and magical bird. So, of course, part of our job as readers is to figure out who would want her bird.

I've never seen a class full of mid-schoolers so happy to be reading English before.

Japanese

2009-03-10T13:29:00.001+08:00

Before you begin, important Cultural Slang: Penis = bird (in Mandarin in Taiwan)

Last week was my final week teaching my class of high schoolers from 3:40 - 6:30 pm on Saturday. Kojen is slowly phasing me out of the work force. I have been asking to dump this class for months. 3 hours + 15-yr-olds + overbearing parents forcing their children to study English + Saturday = FUN TIMES! I took this class over when I came to Taiwan. It took the students exactly 8 months and 3 weeks to warm up to me. We were just finding our flow when Kelly, my boss, told me that she was going to give the class to the new teacher. Poor girl, but I was/am not exactly sad that a) I get off at 3:20 on Saturday now b) don't have to spend 3 hours jumping around like a damn monkey trying to ascertain whether or not there is life in room 523.

The final class I taught was on adjective order. Opinion, size, age, color, shape, origin, material, purpose, etc, etc (there still seems to be some debate as to what the adj order really is, but I digress). As native speakers, we naturally put adjectives in the right order, but SLLs do not. As I was soliciting examples of each category from the class, one of my students tells me that Japanese women are the most beautiful, and then proceeds to crack up like he has just told the funniest joke in the world. We were going over the lesson and every time I would say Japanese the whole class would giggle. I was, as usual, clueless as to what was so humorous, so my student, said, "Teacher, you want to know why so funny?" "Sure, why's it so funny?" "You know English name for man bird?" "Ok, Brandon, we can talk about birds after class." The class had a good chuckle over bird, and then we returned to class.

At the end of class, Brandon explained what was so funny about Japanese. "Panese", he said sounded the same as, you guessed it, "penis". In Taiwanese, not Mandarin, Taiwanese, "ja" means "to eat", so Japanese, in the minds of trilingual Taiwanese 15-yr-olds, means "eat penis".

Ok, so maybe I will miss that class just a little bit.

A Turn for the Worst

2009-03-09T16:52:00.006+08:00

Bissie's friend has started his very own comic. And, hey, what do you know, it's actually amusing. Check it out if you have been neglecting your Internet funny bone.

http://www.aturnfortheworse.com/

The Watchmen

2009-03-09T12:02:00.005+08:00

Yeah, so I read this book and it took me about twice as long as it takes me to read a 300 page book. Material too heavy? No. Material not interesting enough? No. I loved the damn thing. Life distracting you from your reading? No. I live in a foreign country, and I have about 2 friends here. One of whom I live with.

It's just because I am a visual retard. It was my first graphic novel, and I am not much of a comic book reader, so the pictures where interesting and distracting. Instead of flowing nicely into the big picture, I had to micro analyze each box then revisit to grasp the overall picture. So, yes, a book that is 75% pictures took me f-o-r-e-v-e-r to see/read.

But the movie! Today! In the IMAX theater! Woot!

UPDATE and spoiler alert

The Watchmen was definitely an enjoyable viewing. There were a couple of scenes that blew me away, ie// the comedian getting pounded, but it fell short of my expectations. Not a big surprise. They stayed true to the book for the most part, but they sucked all the urgency and desperation out of the world. And in some parts, they stayed true to the book, but on film it just seemed silly. The quickness of the characters' decisions and the general lack of depth in all the main characters, except the Comedian, sucked the meat out of the mission. In my opinion, they focused way too much on the love triangle, but managed to only skim the part about humanity being important and worth saving in the eyes of the masked heroes.

I think Rorschach was well cast, but I hate how they handled his death. He was so weak at his demise. Wrong, wrong, wrong. His mask was awesome. The moving blots were a nice touch. I think he is such an interesting character, it would have been nice to see more of his story revealed, but I understand why they couldn't include it.

What I did enjoy was the new ending. I think it was really clever and kept the spirit of the ending in the book. Although in the book, I do like how he rounds up all the most famous artists and has them create the monstrosity and then kills them all. But, I was bummed that they left out the part where Veidt asks Dr. Manhattan if he did the right thing in the end, and Dr. Manhattan replies that nothing ever ends. They pushed it onto the Silk Spector taking about what John would say, which I thought was totally undercut the books' view on humanity.

Overall, I think they bit off a little more than they could chew. But it was good enough to be interesting to talk about after the show. I would, however, definitely recommend reading the book before seeing the film. I really don't know how I would feel about it if I had never read the book.

Ba Gua Kung Fu

2009-03-08T22:45:00.005+08:00

One of my coworkers, Jeff, invited me to join his Bagua Kungfu class. He studied in the US, and it's one of the reasons he came to Taiwan. My legs are punishing me (They started shaking after the warm up. Wow, feeling a pinch out of shape here), but I was very happy with my Ba Gua Kung Fu class. It's like TaiChi and Kung Fu all mixed together, which means I still felt as though there was a possibility of me kicking someone's ass, but I wouldn't have been surprised if that person happened to be over 80. I'm definitely going back on Tuesday. It feels good to be sore and empowered to put the smackdown on the geriatric population. AND it's a great excuse to post this video.

Cafe Gigi:Shameless Plug

2009-02-24T00:42:00.018+08:00

One of our favorite places in Danshui (淡水, or Tamsui) is Cafe Gigi. On one of my sick days, Philip and his friend, who was visiting, were trying to find the Fort San Domingo 紅毛城. The fort was originally built by the Spanish in 1629. The literal translation of the Chinese name, Red Hair Fort, was in reference to the Danish, who took over the fort in 1642. Like always, when we try to find something, we rarely find said thing. Instead, they found the lovely Cafe Gigi. Cafe Gigi is like how I want my house to be if I was artistic, had any talent for decorating, or a green thumb. The tea is delicious and lovely, it has the only wine I've had in Taiwan that wasn't a little too well aged, and the food is scrumptious and filling. If you ever trek up to Danshui, you must stop here.

The first thing that catches your attention are the paintings on the crumbling stucco outside of the place. They are so not Taiwanese and stick out amidst the Taiwanese architecture. Taiwanese architecture is hard to classify. They seem to be going for the very boxy, stapled together, corrugated tin roof, and if you have the chance to cover things with pool tiles, you really should style. Needless to stay these paintings kind of stand out.

Also, you can't beat the patio on a sunny day.

The tea is yummy and brewed with fruits and roots and comes out looking beautiful.

The dinner selection is limited. There is curry (meat or not) and also the pork meatballs. Both are delicious, reasonable, and filling. She also has small, but tasty selection of wine.
In Taiwan, disgusting, big-enough-to-eat-tropical-sized-cockroaches, spiders mean good fortune. At the lovely Cafe Gigi, we were lucky to have a lot of good fortune on the wall 2 feet from our table, who-wa.
Getting there from Danshui MRT

It's pretty easy to get there in that impossible sort of way. Exit the MRT, turn left. The road you want is Zhongzheng Rd, but of course, that road sign is in Chinese. Basically, there is a fork in the road. You want the road to the left of the bank on the corner and to the right of Starbucks. Keep walking until you see the first temple on your right hand side, Longshan Temple. On the wall of the Longshan Temple you will see the Cafe Gigi sign. It looks like this:
Take a right, and head up the steps:

(handsome Filipino-American tour guide not included)

Follow the steps until you see another sign directing you to your right:
Take the right and walk up the ramp until you see the paintings. You will see the cafe sign just past the paintings. The garden entrance is on your left-hand side.

Pingsi Lantern Festival

2009-02-19T17:02:00.003+08:00

The lantern festival pictures are up.

This fest was probably one of the most beautiful things I have participated in. The idea is to write your wishes on the lanterns, then send those puppies to the heavens. The colors of the lanterns have different meanings. These seemed to vary depending on where you purchased your lanterns. The result is awesome (literal meaning, not Bill and Ted interpretation) - a sky illuminated by wishes.

*If you click on the slide show, it will take you to the Picasa album.

Home Coming

2009-02-19T13:15:00.004+08:00

We have purchased tickets!

We'll be flying into LAX on April 15. From there, we will be driving up nothing no later than April 19th for Greek Easter celebrations. Plans, living situations, and whereabouts get a little fuzzy after that.

Originally, we were planning to fly into Amsterdam for a week or so, then head home. But we have decided to stick around Taiwan and really see the country here before we head out. I told the school I am working for that I am leaving, so of course they are taking away my hours like it is going out of style. (Bastards.) The good news is I have more free time to travel.

Behold the Taiwan Bucket List in no particular order:

1. ~~Snake Alley~~
2. Alishan National Park
3. Taroko Gorge / Haulien
4. Tainan
5. Visit Josephine
6. Visit Tammy
5. ~~Kenting~~
6. Scuba diving of some sort on Green Island
7. ~~Ride the high speed rail~~
8. Ride a bus line to nowhere
9. Eat as many different kinds of snacks as my innards will take.
10. Take my bike down the bike path as long as my little legs will peddle me
11. ~~Koashung~~
12. Yoali
13. Ride scooters up the southern part of Taiwan

This is what we are exporting

2009-02-16T23:00:00.005+08:00

We get Tai-chi, they get Elvira. Behold, in all its glory.

Today feels like...

2009-02-16T17:52:00.003+08:00

In case anyone was wondering, today feels like this:

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

Now, off to Chinese class, where I will finish off the day feeling like this:

OWWTF?OWWTF?OWWTF?OWWTF?OWWTF?OWWTF?OWWTF?OWWTF?OWWTF?OWWTF?OW!!!!!!

I hope all is well with you. I love you and wish you all sunshine, puppies, and red wine that has not turned because it doesn't exist in Taiwan.

Next up...

2009-02-03T13:16:00.005+08:00

Lantern Festival.

There are 2 options. The first option is this:

2009 Pingsi International Sky Lantern Festival

http://www.2009lightup.world.hbpr.com.tw/eng/index-eng.html

The second option is this:

Yanshui Lantern Festival also known as the beehive of fireworks. See the video at the link below.

http://www.gio.gov.tw/info/festival_c/glue_e/tainan.htm

I must be getting old because I don't really want someone shooting fireworks at my face. Pingsi it is.

Happy Birthday!

2009-02-01T14:23:00.002+08:00

This one goes out to Grandma Frances. It's a little early, but hey it's a cool song.

Taichung and Changhua

2009-01-31T23:15:00.002+08:00

I did my first real traveling within Taiwan this week. I went with Phil and Winnie (a reformed student, now friend) to visit Claire (yet another reformed student, now friend). We spent 1 day in Tai-chung and 1 day exploring Changhua County. It was a great little over night trip, plus we had authentic tour guides, so we got to try some new food and see old things in a new way (new being informed in this case).

More amazing, I am posting the pictures on my blog in a timely fashion. Holy crap. That IS amazing.

Tai-Chung

Guandu Temple

2009-01-28T16:28:00.001+08:00

Humbled by their serenity, craftsmanship, and beauty. Temples abound in Taiwan, and I must say, I'm kinda sick of visiting them. But I bet you're not. Pics from Guandu Temple are up...

Guandu Temple

Philippines

2009-01-11T21:11:00.005+08:00

I am back from Cebu, an island in the Philippines. It was a pretty amazing trip, and we got to do some pretty amazing things. Some on the morbid side of spectacular (cock fights and firing M-16s) and others on the more pleasant end of spectacular (snorkeling and island hopping).

Click the picture below to see more of the trip

Ok, now I am just being immature

2009-01-11T13:05:00.003+08:00

Sometimes grading can be fun. See #5.

The National Palace Museum

2008-12-28T16:59:00.006+08:00

This was the welcoming committee for the museum.

This me in front of the Museum, and then the brand spanking new camera's (which rocks, thank you mom and dad!) memory card filled up.

Which was ok because we couldn't take pictures of the art anyway, so here is my rendition of some of the most interesting pieces.

In my opinion, the aboriginal museum across the street was far better lit and organized. It was much more interesting and pleasant to view than the National Palace Museum. Not being able to read Chinese definitely put us at a disadvantage when viewing all the ancient texts. The translations seemed to be lacking helpful or interesting information about any of the pieces. The collection and how it got to China is an interesting story, or at least it seems to be. I haven't been able to find any sources on the Internet to substantiate the claims that American planes were used to transport a good portion of the goods to Taiwan to prevent it from being destroyed during the Cultural Revolution. In fairness to the Internet, I haven't looked very hard yet.

For more information about the NPM, although not much, go here : http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/National_Palace_Museum

The Lovely Nuances of Language

2008-12-26T23:45:00.004+08:00

Found, December 26th, 2008 in the classified ad section of The Taipei Times.

Confucius Parade (I think)

2008-12-02T12:18:00.006+08:00

Before we headed down to check out the Confucius temple, we were pleasantly surprised by what I believe to be a Confucius parade in front of the Danshui MRT. Now, if I had to guess if Confucius was a guy into parades, I would say no, but then again, he and I are not that close.

My favorite part of the parade had to be the kids wearing the Confucius heads. They brought up the tail end of the parade, and the local car and taxi drivers seemed little concerned with the safety of the Confucius heads or the real possibility that the parade of people might serve as a potential road block. Due to this, the variety of Confuci had to dart in and out of traffic in order to avoid becoming Confucius pinatas. This was no easy feat as, I imagine, their range of motion and sight was severely limited. It was still very amusing to watch.

Vow of Silence

2008-12-01T21:29:00.006+08:00

I have been forbidden by my doctor to speak for at least 24 hours or risk permanent damage to my vocal chords.

But really, once my doctor tells me not to talk, of course, I instantly really, really want to talk. I have spent my time thinking about all the people I need to call, and how I should really, really catch up on my communication. And suddenly, I have the burning urge to use my Chinese instead of jumping around like an idiot and pointing at things and pictures. But the hardest part so far (it's been 2.5 hours, and no one is home yet) is that I talk to myself all the damn time. I have to stop myself from talking to myself. A lot.

This vow of silence should be an interesting little journey for me...

Fun, fun, fun

2008-11-30T21:19:00.003+08:00

While my roommates went to Osaka and the Manila respectively, I got laryngitis. I know, I know, I have the good life. And while I have been looking every bit as peaked as I felt pretty much all week, I actually went into teach on Saturday. I learned something through my work experience. When teaching a language, it helps if you can talk. *gasp* And when teaching small, affluent, gender-biased children, regularly verbally abused in their schooling system, it helps even more if you can yell (and use fascist principles), but we can save how I am ~~ruining children and creating culture-bound conformers~~ producing productive contributors to Asian society another day. *

I'm sick is the point of this discussion.

And my Mac has been consistently overheating, so when I stop being sick, I am going to see if the authorized Mac store is indeed an authorized Mac store. (Ok, that wasn't the point at all, but it is a reason this post is ending)

* Do not read this book and then teach in Asia. It will hold you accountable for all your wrong doings.

sign from god?

2008-11-26T01:26:00.001+08:00

Ann Coulter has had her jaw wired shut. I shouldn't laugh, but HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Work and play

2008-11-23T23:14:00.003+08:00

I do to much of it. So, the obvious remedy: Vacation! Not a big one. A little one. A three day one. I'm on it right now, so ta-da! Blog.

The vacation is in my town because my planning skills are lacking. This week I went to my favorite Taiwanese Irish Coffee Shop (Pub with good food). I ran into a ridiculously loud, drunk German woman and her equally drunk although not so loud Finnish boyfriend. It was one of those nights where I feel extremely blessed to speak English, so I can have barely understandable conversations about politics with people from all over the world.

Phil is in the Philippines visiting family and doing a visa run, so I have a couple days to myself.

Day .25: Loud, drunken political discussions and slobbery kisses from large German woman and Finnish husband. (done)
Day 1: Eat pizza and coffee for breakfast. Finally make it down to the apartment movie theater and find out they are showing a little mermaid movie in Chinese. Sign up to workout with the staffed personal trainer at the apartment gym instead. His personal training will turn out to be showing me how to turn the treadmill on. The treadmill was in English. (done) Write a blog. Read Phil's novel draft.
Day 2: Get my ARC card fixed. Change my bike tire. Go as far as my legs will willingly take me. Start studying Chinese officially again.
Day 3: Go on a hike in Yangmingshan. Go for a soak in the hot springs there.

I am so very desperately trying not to worry about what happens after the vacation. The catch up. The silliness that has me stressed out and sleep deprived on a regular basis. In time, I will find a balance between work and life again. In time.

I have pictures, although not many because I lost my camera on a bike ride a couple weeks ago. I will try to get those up on day 2, but it is not on my official agenda, so who knows.

Reviews

2008-10-27T22:19:00.003+08:00

This is a 5 asterisk system.

(*)*Beneath the Underdog: His World as Composed by Mingus - Charles Mingus : Giving this book a star is a formality. I know it ain't easy being a pimp and all, but do you have to spell shit, schitt? If you are really interested in how many bitches Charles Mingus has stuck his joint up, this is your book. Now granted the time, Phil was reading Immortality by Milan Kundara, so exchanging bits of wisdom by respective authors was pretty damn hilarious. Phil told numerous times to just leave the book alone, but I read on. I had about 100 pages left before I had to put the book down for my own health and sanity.

*It really isn't fair to review a book I never finished reading. I just wanted you to know how much I hated this book.

(**) Slam - Nick Hornby: "Meh" is my general feeling about this book. I like Hornby, but this book is subpar in every way. The story is traditional Hornby boy dealing with "maturing", although this time it is a teenager). The whole magic Tony Hawk poster is awkard and unnecessary. The ending is hack writing and screams "I am sick of writing this story!!" It is only mildy funny at times. You won't be mad you spent time reading it like Beneath the Underdog and that is about all I can give this book as far as recommendation.

(****)The Curious Incident of the Dog and the Night-time - Mark Haddon: This book was a delightful read. It is heartbreaking and also tries your patience. Haddon does an excellent job of showing the perspective a 15-year-old autistic boy as he sets out to find the killer of his neighbor's dog. This book made me realize that many of my friends probably have undiagnosed autism. I kid, I kid.

Is it wrong to love bagels and cream cheese this much?

2008-10-20T22:44:00.005+08:00

While the amount of Western influence here makes me sad, I really could have kissed my co-worker who went to Costco - yes, they have Costco here - and brought me back raviolis, bagels, cream cheese and a hunk of mozzarella cheese. I feel like such a American whore when I do things like that - eat at McDonald's, PizzaHut, Dominoes, Starbucks, and now we can add, 3rd person shopping at Costco. I have eaten at all of these places, and the comfort of eating there is frightening. The food isn't great, of course, but it's easy and familiar and no one has exchange looks of "I have no clue as to what you are referring to" and I can safely answer yes to all of the questions. But back to the bagels - wonderful, gloriousness.
Taipei is clearly far too big and far too international to force me to have any sort of cultural experience here. I will have to seek it out, and who knows what that really looks like or means. The next generation of Taiwanese seems to enjoy hanging out at McDonald's (McCafe's, and open 24-hours. It's a much more pleasant environment when late night employees don't have to deal with drunk assholes or the fear of armed robbery) *Gasp*

Enough about that...

Feeding the Love. This is a more entertaining idea (says me) started (though probably not invented) by heels - the Ron Paul huggin', cunt of woman she is. She did a lovely post where she said tear-jerkingly nice things about people I love and people she loves as well, so I would like to jump on the wagon. I'm a big fan of love notes. As a person with an obtuse sense of humor and an often malfunctioning brain to mouth filter, I find it's really, really, really, really important to remind people that I truly love and adore them because the ones closest to me often catch the brunt of my wrath. I can't sit down and list everyone I love at one time. It's too overwhelming and exhausting and I start gushing tears. It ain't pretty, so instead of feeding the love as requested, I'm rationing the love. One per post. Requests are welcome. And, well, where to start seems pretty easy...

Dani - I have known you for a really long time. I really love how I can look back and see what twits we were at different times. I think I beat you on length of twit stage, but you are right, you did start out as my best friend's older sister, and then my older brother's friend. I think I can pin point the beginning of my awe and appreciation of the tenacity of how your beliefs and humor mix and mingle when my brother and I went to visit John, You, Emmy, and Spence down at the house near the high school. I think I nearly peed my pants looking at the Mormon brochure you defiled and left on your door as repellent for boys in bicycle helmets, white button-up shirts, and ties. You are hilarious, smart, witty, nurturing, loyal, and still as fierce as ever. These will always be qualities that will be as often adored as misunderstood. You are a gorgeous, rare human being. I am thankful that I know you and your family.

How do you spell that again?

2008-10-14T23:30:00.003+08:00

I have a Chinese name. I've had this name for a while. My friend, Wen, actually named me way before I left for Taiwan. My Chinese name is now officially being used by the university I work for. In order to get paid, I needed a Chinese name. Done and done. Happy as a clam, I took my check issued to 安以仁 to my bank. Yes, that's me. I'm the pretty pictures. (It still hasn't quite sunk in that Chinese characters are anything other than art, even though I can now recognize the Chinese character for scissors)

Then horror of all horrors, the teller asked me to endorse the check in Chinese. After flipping the check back and forth several times, I made my best effort to write my name. The teller looked, laughed, and said, "I go ask. Wait." I heard my Chinese name thrown between her and her supervisor, and then she came back. "She say ok you to cross out, write again." So I crossed my name out, and stood there sweating and embarrassed because I had(have) no clue as to how to write my name. She said, "Thank you, no worry. I write." And she wrote it for me in Chinese. While having someone else endorse my checks is a bit scary, I can't explain how relieved I was.

"What's your name little girl?"
"I have no f-ing clue."

Oh, anonymity. Why?

2008-10-12T15:34:00.005+08:00

I received an e-mail this morning from someone who is not a fan of my friend's blog. And not a fan, as in made an e-mail address and blog titled (name)is.ugly and (name)sucks respectively. This person posted pictures of her and called my friend, in essence, a big meanie head with, like, her, own opinions and shit, and how dare she share these opinions on her (her) blog. What a bitch.

My fatal flaw in this lifetime is expecting people to have some sense. If you don't like her blog, don't read her blog. Or even better, explain why you disagree her opinions without using words such as beatch, cunt, or spelling "can" with a k. Everyone walks away happy.

I think Penny Arcade summed up this dilemma, which happens on the Internets more often than it should, quite nicely.

Attack of the Giant Grasshopper and Happy 10/10

2008-10-10T13:39:00.006+08:00

This picture doesn't reveal just how big this grasshopper actually is. This sucker is about 4 inches long and 2 inches tall and damn frightening when it randomly jumps into your path.

Can you spot the grasshopper? (Click the pictures for super spy glasses close-up)

We have today off. It is 10/10. Sort of like Taiwanese Independence Day. More like the Republic of China got kicked out of China by the commies (People's Republic of China) and relocated to Taiwan. You can read more, but not much, about it here

Typhoon

2008-09-28T23:34:00.003+08:00

Another typhoon. The eastern version of a hurricane. I'll be honest, up until 2 weeks ago I thought a typhoon was just a baby hurricane. It's not. I also had warped the meaning of the word mercenary. My mental image was putting a little too much faith in the "mercy" sounding quality of the word. I was thinking more like Bono than Blackwater. Phil got a pretty good laugh out of that one. But mercy gaffe aside, it is amazing how quickly I have become desensitized to 90 mph winds. But I suppose, it's not like I am trying to forge my way through the madness outside. Nope, I'm inside, on the 7th floor of a new building, making egg sandwiches with my boyfriend, obsessively watching Heroes, season 1. (Done, le pout. Can't wait for season 2. Yes, I've been informed it sucks, but the addiction needs to be fed, people. The addiction needs to be fed)

Words

2008-09-21T13:36:00.002+08:00

Happy, Happy Birthday to Wen, Daniel, Cousin Jenny, Cousin Jeff, Josiah, Susie, Lyndsey, AJ, and Amy and anyone else who is a late summer early fall baby.

I was talking with my co-worker about the novelty of going back to the states and being able to talk to children. I do miss that. The kids in my classes are lovely, for the most part. We operate off a mutual understanding that we probably like each other. We both seem nice enough. Their English is a collection of stunted questions and answers. My Chinese is the one stunted question of what is your name. Which they think is hilarious.

Tea-chA! You know name, hahahaha.

Having a conversation with someone other than Phil that is fluid and not a frustrating wrestling match for understandable words and phrases will also be a novelty. I miss the possibility of this and mimosas and frou-frou scrambles and hollandaise sauce. Oh and my friends, and my family, and live music, and superhero dress up parties.

Teaching at the university has gone swimmingly. It’s still early in the semester, but week 2 was as promising as week 1. I’m excited about the poetry class because my students are excited and scared, but not frustrated. Yet. I hope they remain that way. I showed them Taylor Mali’s “What Teacher’s Make, or Objection Overruled, or If things don't work out, you can always go to law school”

One of my students voiced his displeasure and disbelief that this was poetry. “This is poetry. So scary. Teacher, I am Chinese. This is too loud.” I told him there are many different kinds of poetry. We have everything from Taylor Mali to Shakespeare. To which he replied in horror, “They read Shakespeare like this?!?!”

My students have a romantic idea about poetry and what it should be. This should be an interesting journey for both of us. Ok, off to the beach with me.

Cliff notes of a long lost post

2008-09-14T12:08:00.004+08:00

No, you aren't losing it. The previous post was deleted mostly on purpose, so here are the cliff notes.

Phil has an ear infection
Taiwan hospitals don't feel like death
I started work at St. John's University in Taiwan
Eric locked himself on the roof, and you should read about it and see the cool picture he took of the approaching typhoon here

Life has become boring and entertaining all at once, but that probably is too long for a title for a blog

2008-09-07T22:59:00.003+08:00

Hey!

That's right, I'm talking to you. Where you been, eh? You don't write. You don't call (except Mom. Mom I need to call you back).

Phil has arrived and we've proceeded to being incredibly boring. You know, having conversations and generally enjoying each other's company. It's nice to have someone to point with and spend too much time ordering and looking for food.

and there was something here to wrap this blog up, but I deleted it. And there was an apology for deleting the nice blog wrap up, but I deleted that too.

I like to juggle

2008-08-23T22:27:00.003+08:00

Today is the second day back at work. It was a long day, but I feel better. I still sound like a frog, but I've got my wits about me and my head no longer feels like it's in a bubble.

Today made me laugh. It was a series of things that tested my maturity and of course, I failed miserably.

The sentence pattern for my K10 class was:

What does the blank know how to do?
The blank knows how to blah, blah, blah.

What can the blank do?
The blank can blah, blah, blah.

All was well and good until we came to the clown.

Teacher: What does the clown know how to do?
Students: The clown knows how to juggle balls.
Teacher: *giggles* No, no the clown knows how to juggle.
Teacher: What can the clown do?
Students: The clown can juggle balls.
Teacher: *giggles* The clown can juggle. No balls *giggles again*
Students: TEAcher, WHATa?!
Teacher: What does the clown know how to do?

Etc, etc until the whole class understands that the clown does not juggle balls. Even though he does, but you can't tell 10-year-olds that balls are slang for testicles because I don't know how to say testicles in Mandarin. And while I am willing to attempt to draw lopsided pictures of a lot of vocabulary in the course of an EFL class, drawing testicles for 10-year-olds will not be one of those things

Cough

2008-08-20T21:31:00.003+08:00

So I am sick. It has finally happened. I've been infected with Asian fever. No, I am not talking about being madly in love with Phil. And besides, technically, I think he is Pacific Islander. He is coming out next Tuesday by the way. Did I mention how excited I am? Actually, I don't think I have, but anyway I digress

I have a slight fever, headache, what feels like two suction cups clamped onto my ears, runny nose, and a sore throat. I called in sick today. I feel no inclination to be a good worker bee today. I literally did nothing. I got of bed to go to the bathroom and to refill my water glass. Exciting. I'm writing now only because I dumped a packet of emergen C into my water, and it has made me a little antsy.

What I am worried about is really quite lame. In Taiwan, when you are sick it is considered courteous to wear a medical mask (they have all sorts of stylish varieties). This is for 2 reasons*. The first reason is, duh, not to spread germs when you sneeze and snot and do all sorts of lovely things. The second is to let other people know that you are sick and they shouldn't lick your face or the bus handrails you used. And while I know this is courteous and probably a good idea, I really, really, really don't want to do it. The idea of wearing a mask all day in the sweltering Taiwan heat sounds completely unappealing. I mean, I've done it for costume parties, why can't I just suck it up here as well?

I'm really dreading this. I don't have any at the house, but at school, they're probably going to ask me to put one on because it's a school and it's super easy to infect a bajillion people.

Yuck, yuck, indeed.

Teaching messes with my self-esteem

2008-08-16T00:24:00.003+08:00

Sometimes teaching is a lousy job. You have to be one solid individual to be an excellent teacher. You also have to have an infinite supply of creativity, energy, patience, and respect. And, according to Harold, the ability to yell at children and not have it ruin your day.

I am definitely, definitely not there yet.

Danshui: Tour guide of sorts

2008-08-11T16:50:00.004+08:00

It occurred to me that my blog could also be a useful resource for other people. There isn't a lot of practical information about the area of Danshui, so here is my first tid bit. It isn't helpful for soaking in the local culture, but I was damn excited about it.

MEXICAN FOOD!! and decent Mexican food at that. They have homemade tortillas and everything. No joke. The waiter was half Dominican, half Taiwanese, so I won't vouch for the authenticity of this Mexican food, but the burrito I had was tasty.

Getting to Eddy's Cantina by foot from Danshui MRT:

Walk toward McDonald's. Take a left on to Zhong Shan (zheng) Rd. Keep walking until you reach a fork in the road. You should see Eddy's Cantina at the corner of Zhong Shan Rd. N. and Zhong Zheng Rd. If you stay to the right you will walk past Danshui Elementary school, and if this happens, you've gone too far.

Professor Teacher

2008-08-11T15:27:00.003+08:00

I am Professor Teacher again, as my students at College of Alameda so fondly called me - mostly because they couldn't say my name.

I had an interview at St. John's University today. It went well. They offered me the position on the spot. The part-time gig, as per usual, was through nepotism. The lovely George swoops in with all sorts of awesome again. Many thanks to that man. Pretty soon I will actually be qualified for these positions. I kid, I kid, kinda.

I'm pretty excited. It starts in fall. I will be teaching a basic conversation class, writing and rhetoric course, and a poetry class. There is also ample opportunity for research, which is helpful for me, as I only have a MA. (Does that read as snobby as it sounded in my head?)

SO

DO send any and all poems and short stories you love. Also, please DO send any and all poetry lesson plans you have kicking around in your teacher files. If you're not a teacher, take a minute to reflect on any kick ass poetry projects you did whilst a student all those years ago.

Please and xie xie.

The Lovely Keelung

2008-08-11T08:53:00.005+08:00

For the full album, you can go here

Keelung

So not true snort

2008-08-10T23:50:00.004+08:00

I really, really have to thank Heels for sending me a card from someecards (though it wasn't this one, it was this one when I left for Taiwan). It has changed my life.

Danshui (foreigners included)

2008-08-10T23:05:00.005+08:00

Our local night market

Steve fit right in

Yep, everyone was hitting their head on the roof of the bus.

View of the rail and Fisherman's Wharf in the background

Walking bridge to F.W.

Yes, you're still a tourist

2008-08-10T15:47:00.002+08:00

I had my first official visitor yesterday. My friend Steve bopped up from Taichung to say hey and check out Danshui. His work takes him Asia pretty regularly. It was a disconnect seeing someone from the states in Taiwan. I feel like I stepped into an alternate universe and having the lines cross is a bit odd, but it is a delightful odd.

I'm not a good hostess. I've done a terrible job of exploring Danshui, so everything is still in the "sure, let's give it a go and hope we find something cool" stage. Basically, Steve came, we tried some new food at the night market, headed to Fisherman's Wharf and then headed home. In between all of this was not knowing how to get there or back or knowing where or what to eat. For me, this is fun, but not everybody is super excited for ordering things called Buddha Jump Wall and poking your chopsticks into soup and eating the random, unidentifiable things - even after you put them in your mouth - that come out.

That being said, it was great to see Steve. His appearance really inspired me to get to know my area a little better.

Hi Teacher!

2008-08-08T14:44:00.002+08:00

Now I know what the word teacher is in Chinese. I also know how to say hello. But, I haven't really registered words in a sequence.

If someone says in English, "How do you say teacher?" I would say, "Lou shi." However, when my students speak to me in Chinese. This is what I hear: blaaah, blaAAAh, blah, blah (This is my impression of Chinese tones).

Recently, my student said (in Chinese), "Hey teacher." And I understood and responded in English. I realize it's the base form of communication, but good god I was excited. I've been here 2 months people. I don't think I'm a natural when it comes to Chinese. I'm what we in the language education world lovingly call a slow student.

Fun story. The end.

Stories to Tell

2008-08-04T23:49:00.004+08:00

1. Had an awesome day with my former student, Winnie. (Thank you Winnie. You Rock!) She drove my roommate and I around Keelung and stuffed us full of food. We also went to see the Golden Waterfall *snort*

2. Bought a bike!! Super cheap - Bike and all the accessories cost less than my previous bike. Now, it is a piece of shit (plastic pedals and weighs a ton), but there is an beautiful bike path that winds down the river by my house. And people ride their bikes at 11 pm with no fear of being mugged. What a novelty!

3. The Taiwanese are, in general, fucking awesome. Helpful, kind, patient, and have really gone out of their way to help me even when I don't ask (Not that I could ask, haha) . It's silly and small, but still an incredibly moving experience, but I'm too sleepy to tell you about it.

Good Brother, I have one

2008-08-04T23:48:00.001+08:00

How to tell if you have a good brother....

He sends you cheese half way around the world. Yipee! Thanks O!

Coming to a Theater Near You

2008-07-27T21:04:00.005+08:00

2008-07-24T10:57:00.016+08:00

Welcome to Our Home

The dining table.

The Kitchen

The Living Room
The View from the Living Room
Your Bedroom

Main Bathroom (AKA Eric's Bathroom) The shower is one of those spiffy, car wash-esque showers where you have a regular shower head, a rain shower head, and water nozzles spraying you from the side. My Room. This is where I sweat. My AC doesn't work yet. It will be fixed tomorrow (cross your fingers)

Notice the well placed light switch. (There is also one by the door)

A crappy picture of my bathroom...
I'm very excited about my toilet. Apparently, these toilets are super common in Japan. But anyway, it has a remote control. I can also heat the seat, change the water intensity and temperature for the bidet and torture my unsuspecting guests. This toilet is awesome.
The Apartment Facilities

1. Basketball Court

2. The Swimming Pool

3. Steam Room / Sauna4. KTV Room - Karaoke

5. Gym6. Cafe

7. View from the Top

Oh yeah, there is also a movie theater. So, there it is. Not too shabby, eh? Next order of business, um, when are you coming to visit?

Side note: Some of these were stolen from a professional.

2008-07-21T23:59:00.002+08:00

I have a new address and a San Francisco skype number, so it won't cost you a billion dollars to catch up on all things oversized in Taiwan. If you aren't a creepy internet stalker (or at least one I know), shoot me an e-mail and I will pass along my contact information.

I promise I will charge my camera batteries and take pictures of the beautiful apartment I just moved into. And it is beautiful. It even has a room especially for you when you come to visit.

2008-07-18T23:50:00.003+08:00

Moving tomorrow...

Happy Birthday to Me!

Starting tomorrow, my temporary contact information will be invalid. You'll probably have to talk to my ex-roommate... IF he decides to come out of his room, which is unlikely. So, maybe you'll just listen to the phone ring in a foreign country. Wow, so exotic.

2008-07-16T23:24:00.002+08:00

I'm actually not sure about the blog etiquette of how far you are supposed to let your blog lag behind the real pace of your life. Perhaps I should take the high road to blogging as Bissie said (mind you this is paraphrased with a pinch of reading in between the lines)- some people are skilled at chronicling every day life. You are not one of those people.

Danshui beaches. Danshui is actually on a river. We caught the bus in Danshui to go to the beach. The beach we choose was an hour bus ride away. I believe it was called White Sands Beach. I didn't get the Chinese translation for a couple reasons. 1) My teacher trainer, George - Taiwanese, brilliant (phD from Cambridge in linguistics) recommended this beach. Here is a reinactment of the conversation:

A:"George, do you want to go to Fulong beach?"
G:"Ewww, so dirty. When are you going?"
A:"We'll probably go on Saturday. Ewww? Why, what beach should I go to?"
G:"You should take the MRT (Taiwanese BART) to Danshui. Get off the train. Walk across the street. The bus you want has no number. It is all in Chinese. So, you must rely on the kindness of strangers. They will help you go to a nice beach."
A:"Why don't I rely on the kindness of you?"
G:"I can't swim."
A:"You live on a fucking island."
G:"I know how to put on a life jacket."

I have met a lot of Taiwanese who don't know how to swim. Curious, curious indeed. Harold, our other teacher trainer, proceeded to tell me that going to the beach in Taiwan is like putting on a hot, moist blanket to bake in the sun.

However, I think the trip was totally worth it if only to see this...
Oh man. You have got to love speedos. Most of the women were in t-shirts and shorts. I'm not sure if this is due to modesty or a fear of getting tan. The Taiwanese women (in general) are anti-tanning. The whiter, the sexier, which I just love. Being beautiful is a very confusing endeavor. Beauty product companies have of course jumped on this desire to stay pasty. There are a multitude of skin bleaching creams and products available. Yipee! I wonder if they turn you a weird really light shade of orange instead of a dark shade of orange like the tanning creams in the states...

The beach was lovely. We were able to rent some shade (tent) and a beach mat.

(Roomate Eric's ass and our beach tent.)

The water was perfect. Cool enough to give me some reprieve from the heat, but warm enough to make it a pleasant experience. There was only 1 problem.

Jellyfish. Hundreds of tiny jellyfish.

I spotted the little buggers early on. My roommate and I seemed to be the only ones concerned about them. Everyone was laughing and playing without a care in the world. My roommate, Eric, and I both got stung. It wasn't traumatic and life threatening, but it definitely wasn't pleasant. And also was definitely not something I would be excited to endure more than once.

One girl was swimming next to us. She also seemed to be looking at the jellyfish, so I asked her,"Do they sting?"
"No."
"Can I touch them?
"NOOOOO!!!!"

She then proceeded to go back to frolicking in the water without a care in the world.

Regardless, the beach was beautiful...

It was strange because all the people at the beach were concentrated in one area. There was a section for swimming that was buoyed off and everyone pretty much stayed in that area (full of jellyfish). We couldn't find anyone to ask, but there was plenty of beach area without 50 billion people. We, of course, stayed in this area. When in Rome... I found out later that Taiwan doesn't have a continental shelf, so the water gets really deep, really quickly. Because of this, there are some nasty undertows and currents swirling around the island.

It was a pretty awesome day. I absolutely loved the Danshui area. So much so, I'm probably going to get an apartment there. A beautiful, beautiful apartment. In fact, I'm signing the contract in just a little bit. YAY!!

More on that later, too. I think it's safe to assume anything I write about in here actually happened about 2 weeks ago.

2008-07-08T21:53:00.000+08:00

So I have been doing some touristy things that are probably far more interesting than traumatizing run-ins with German malts.

Oooo, aaawww.
Taipei 101, the tallest building in the world, as seen from Dr. Sun Yet-sen Memorial Hall

Me scaling the tallest building in the world in the observatory in the tallest building in the world.

There all sorts of space-agey things and pretty lights going on in the walk ways in Taipei 101. This is my former roommate Brie walking down a hall on the way to the wind damper ball.

The wind damper ball is a huge pendulum that sways to offset movements in the building caused by wind. Evidently, it is a little breezy up there.

Apparently, the wind damper ball is a whore because there are a bunch of damper babies running around the place that look like this. They are quite frightening and should not be trusted.

There is also a lot of different art pieces for purchase in the observatory. This picture shames the ornate detail in this gold, but you get the idea.

And while at the top of Taipei 101, you shouldn't do this. From the looks of these pictures, it's probably a good rule of thumb never to do these activities in public.

Wow, did the view suck.
The area surrounding Taipei is mountainous and green. The 360 view from the top is just incredible. I can't wait to go back at night time.

More on beaches in Danshui and jelly fish later...

2008-07-06T23:16:00.000+08:00

Word to the wise.

No matter how many corner stores in Taiwan place this beverage in the beer section, it is not a beer. You will be sorely disappointed if you drink it thinking it is beer. Yes, it is in a can. Yes, it is from Germany. I don't speak German, but I'm pretty sure Malz is not German for beer. It might be German for corn syrup, but it is definitely not German for beer.

2008-07-05T20:44:00.000+08:00

American Food

Since I came here, I’ve had two breakdowns as far as food goes. The first food breakdown being McDonald’s. I think McDonald’s is gross, and the brand of American un-culture that comes with it equally disgusting. But there is something genuinely satisfying about holding up 5 fingers and someone handing you a tray of food that is identifiable. The pure ease of ordering is sweet, fatty, soy/random meat byproduct bliss.

Today was my second slip up. While I’ve managed to avoid most drugs in my lifetime, there are two things that I am addicted to. The first being coffee - with the physical side effects of addiction and all. The second being cheese. I love cheese, and I love specialty cheeses even more. So being in Taiwan where most of the cheese is in the form of a Craft cheese single or that plastic-y Velveeta cheese imitation, the ordering process can be disappointing.

It goes something like this:
“YAY, cheese!”
A confused looking, but unconditionally sweet service worker brings me my plate of food.
“Yes, that is definitely orange. Yes, that is definitely in a square, cheese-like shape. Yes, it is on my sandwich type item. But I can say with 99.9% certainty that what I am eating is not cheese.” My heart breaks, and my arteries unclog a little just about the thought of it.

So as I was walking home today, there was a Dominoe’s. It had a ray of sunshine beaming down to the front door. The advertisement on the window had a pizza covered in cheese (and an assortment of other things I personally wouldn’t put on a pizza such as carrots, peas, and corn, but I digress. The important thing was it had cheese. A lot of cheese). I ordered a pizza. And chicken wings. And garlic bread. And a salad. (Apparently, one pizza is crazy expensive. The pizza meal is crazy expensive, but cheaper than just one pizza. Yeah, I don’t understand either).

I walked home with my big ol’ stack of food. I felt guilty. I spent more money ordering pizza than I had spent on food from my awesome vendors in one week. Not only that, I felt like the big, dumb, gluttonous American tourist who came to Taiwan to eat fucking Dominoe’s. If ever I had a walk of shame, this was it.

Once the door to the apartment closed, I guilty set down my stack of food. My roommate Eric was sitting on the couch. I could feel him staring at me in disbelief.

“I had a craving.”
“I can see that.”
“Do you want some pizza?”

His chin dropped to the ground, and he then looked up at me.

“I’ve been really craving American food, too.”

This is probably the best pizza I have ever consumed. I recommend a whole heaping side of guilt to go with your Dominoe’s pizza. I assure you it’s the only way to make that thing taste mind bogglingly good.

2008-07-02T19:18:00.001+08:00

So sweet. So awkward.

2008-06-30T10:21:00.000+08:00

Yangmingshan National Park

I was able to purchase a lovely little book with a bunch of day hikes within the Taipei area. On Sunday, my housemates and I set out to actually accomplish one of the day hikes. Being the adventurous, spontaneous group we are, we started with day trip #1 to Seven Star Peak in Yangmingshan National Park.

Yangmingshan is a quickish MRT and bus ride away. One gets spoiled really quickly with useful, timely public transportation. The MRT is Taipei's version of BART. It's exactly like BART except it is cleaner, faster, cheaper, timelier, traveler friendly, and takes you into dense tropical jungle. Riding the MRT, you get to see how quickly Taipei melts into wilderness, but there is still a scattering of houses no matter where you go. Once we exited the MRT, we jumped on to a bus (extended mini van) and proceeded up the mountain (attempting to kill as many scooter riders, cyclists, and motorists as we could) into the park. The park is amazingly beautiful and teeming with life.

I cannot begin to describe to you how incredibly noisy the jungle is. The noise is high pitched and constant. There is the never ending screech from the cicadas. Along with that, there is a chorus of birds that sounds exactly like car brakes that are past their prime. One bird starts braking and then the other birds start braking. It is a rhythmic wave of noise that continued the entire hike. At times the noise is almost deafening. It is really quite astonishing.

There is also a sulfurous smell hanging in the air. This is due to the volcanic activity in the area. Next trip into the park, I am going to find the hot springs and enjoy the upside to sulfurous gas.

The hike up to the top was difficult. The humidity was kicking my ass. I was sweating profusely and breathing hard the entire length up. My little legs were shaking. My housemates handled the hike much better than I.

There were little breaks in the canvas the higher we got up. As we ascended we walked into some dense fog. But there were little patches where you could view Taipei. The view was stunning and my little point and shoot doesn't do it justice.

Yangmingshan National Park is firmly against Burning Man. Either that or the devil. I couldn't decide.

The housemates and I at the top of Seven Star Peak.

The hike up consisted of mass amounts of beautiful butterflies. The butterflies would change according to the elevation. At the lower levels, there were huge black butterflies. At the mid-elevation there were black and blue butterflies. At the top of Seven Start, there were hundreds of these dark brown and light blue butterflies. Flocks of butterflies in the mist are a truly beautiful site to behold.

The view from the top.

On the way back down the mountain, it started dumping rain. I can't remember the last time I was out playing in the rain like that. It was incredible. We were soaking wet and received a shit ton of dirty looks from the other people riding the bus, but all in all an incredible day.

2008-06-25T08:54:00.000+08:00

I've been slacking on the whole taking of pictures end of things. This is the street I live on. Not many people in Taipei (pronounced Taibei*) have yards, so the rooftop is where they usually barbeque and other backyard type activities. Some of the rooftop spaces are covered in foliage and look like little, private jungles. It's really beautiful.

As always, there is much more Taiwanese goodness (and culture differences that I could live without ie//They don't flush their toilet paper, which while gross, sounds much worse than it is) that needs to be conveyed.

In good time. In good time.

*I found out it was pronounced Taibei yesterday. Turns out 7 yr-olds are geniuses and their foreigner teacher is silly and doesn't know the name of the place she lives (America according to them, but they were willing to let me say I lived in Taibei. Not Taipei) Who knew?

2008-06-25T08:50:00.000+08:00

Mmm. Mmm. Mmm. Rainbow Balls Cerear.

2008-06-23T22:06:00.000+08:00

Please exit in a calm and orderly fashion

2008-06-20T09:09:00.000+08:00

Taipei, Taipei, Taipei

It is definitely an urban area. The city pulses with well-dressed young professionals buzzing around on scooters. If the traffic pace doesn't agree with them, they don't seem to hesitate to take the sidewalk. I had the pleasure of almost getting my toes taken off by two just walking the 4 blocks to work this morning. The American movie watcher in me expects them to run into a vegetable stand or into two men who just happen to be carrying a window pane across the sidewalk at that exact moment. I cannot help but be disappointed when this doesn't happen.

Everything is slightly gray here due the lovely combination of humidity and pollution. Despite lacking very much visual aesthetic, it feels good here. Upon first impression, the stress and tension that I find in most major American cities doesn't seem to be intertwined with the chaos of Taipei. I will keep in mind that I have walked around about 4 square blocks total so far, so at the moment, this is an absurd generalization.

The western influence has definitely taken hold in Taipei as well. There is a 7-11 on every corner. I have also seen a Starbucks and 2 McDonalds. I am sitting in a cafe called Corner. From the looks of it, it was inspired by Starbucks. It has air conditioning, and the coffee was more expensive than my breakfast. Breakfast was 25 NTD, roughly 80 cents, while the cup o' joe was 45 NTD, roughly $1.50. I'm not sure if that is overpriced, but if they were really following Starbucks' lead, I'm sure it is.

Tai-where

Behold the Modern Toilet

Promises

I'll miss you Grandpa

Full of It

Craptastic

Economic Crisis

Birds on the Brain

Japanese

A Turn for the Worst

The Watchmen

Ba Gua Kung Fu

Cafe Gigi:Shameless Plug

Pingsi Lantern Festival

Home Coming

This is what we are exporting

Today feels like...

Next up...

Happy Birthday!

Taichung and Changhua

Guandu Temple

Philippines

Ok, now I am just being immature

The National Palace Museum

The Lovely Nuances of Language

Confucius Parade (I think)

Vow of Silence

Fun, fun, fun

sign from god?

Work and play

Reviews

Is it wrong to love bagels and cream cheese this much?

How do you spell that again?

Oh, anonymity. Why?

Attack of the Giant Grasshopper and Happy 10/10

Typhoon

Words

Cliff notes of a long lost post

Life has become boring and entertaining all at once, but that probably is too long for a title for a blog

I like to juggle

Cough

Teaching messes with my self-esteem

Danshui: Tour guide of sorts

Professor Teacher

The Lovely Keelung

So not true *snort*

Danshui (foreigners included)

Yes, you're still a tourist

Hi Teacher!

Stories to Tell

Good Brother, I have one

Coming to a Theater Near You

So not true snort